THE TROJAN HORSE (1961)

We're nine years into the fabled Trojan War, nine years after Paris from Troy abducted Helen from Sparta, and the Geeks have held Troy under siege since then. The Greek hero Achilles (I'll be including place name adjectives just to keep things clear for myself) has killed the Trojan hero Hector and disrespectfully dragged the body in the dirt behind his chariot. Aeneas, who has brought a wounded soldier back to Troy, believes that this war over Helen has dragged on far too long. When he is told that Helen is a symbol of Troy's prestige and glory, he replies "Helen is our gravedigger," which is hard to dispute. King Priam learns that Hector's body is to be left for the vultures, and decides to go to the Greeks to ask for the body. Aeneas plans to join him, but Paris, a bit of a passive jerk, is jealous of the respect that Aeneas has built up in Troy, so he orders Aeneas not to go, but Priam insists. At the Greek camp, Priam is given Hector's body, but in order to get Hector's weapons to give to his widow Andromache, Aeneas has to fight the Greek strongman Ajax. Aeneas wins, a victory which just adds to Paris's jealousy. Paris sends Aeneas off to build up an army, then sends his sister Creusa, pregnant by Aeneas, to Greece as a hostage to be held for a temporary truce. The Greek king Agamemnon also asks for chariots, gold, and a large quantity of wood for building purposes. If you've read Virgil (or have seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail), you know what's coming. Aeneas and his troops battle the Greeks, with Paris shooting an arrow into the Achilles' heel, killing him. The Greeks retreat, leaving behind a giant wooden horse, supposedly built to honor the god Poseidon. Priam's daughter Cassandra, known as a seer, warns that the horse contains the seeds of Troy's destruction, but it is brought into the walled city anyway. As we know, inside the horse is a group of Greek warriors, led by Menelaus (the legit husband of Helen), who, late at night, break out of the horse, set fire to the city, open the gates, and let in the Greek troops who wreak total destruction.

Despite having read some Virgil and Homer in my youth, I've never been clear about the Trojan War, but this adventure film presents its climax in a way that is easy to understand, even as it leaves out any mention of the meddling Greek gods. The budget for this peplum must have been higher than average, with spectacular sets, decent battle scenes, and huge numbers of extras—you often see the phrase "a cast of thousands" used in publicity for these kinds of films, and in this case, I'd believe it. The director, Giorgio Ferroni, made several sword-and-sandal movies (though his real classic is the small scale horror film MILL OF THE STONE WOMEN. He is clearly in his element here. Barry Atkinson, peplum expert, considers this film to be superior to the Brad Pitt TROY from 2004. The horse is impressive and the climactic fall of Troy is particularly well handled. Acting, rarely a strong area in peplum films, is adequate here. It's a little strange to have muscled hero Steve Reeves playing a character who doesn't prevail (Aeneas), though he does escape the destruction at the end and goes off with others to help found Rome. Actually, except for Paris, there really are no traditional peplum heroes and villains—there is good and bad in the actions of both populations. John Drew Barrymore has the relatively small role of Ulysses; Mimmo Palmara makes an impression in his few minutes as Ajax. For the record, Edy Vessel is Helen and Warner Bentivegna is Paris. The print I watched on YouTube is widescreen and in pretty good shape. Pictured are Palmara and Reeves. [YouTube]

CHARLIE CHAN AT MONTE CARLO (1937)

Detective Charlie Chan and his oldest son Lee are in Monte Carlo on their way to Paris where Lee is exhibiting a painting. French policeman Joubert is happy to (literally) run into them and takes them to the casino where he points out Savarin and Karnoff, bitter enemies in business as well as gambling. Gordon Chase, secretary to Karnoff, reveals to Joan, Gordon’s sister and Karnoff’s wife, that $25,000 of metallurgic bonds (the movie's MacGuffins) are missing, and he knows she took them to get out of some trouble. The problem is that Karnoff is sending his bonds by messenger to Paris in a deal to dump them and wreck Savarin. That night, the messenger is found dead in his car on the way to the airport, the bonds gone. Evelyn, Savarin's mistress, was seen near the car and falls under suspicion as does Savarin and, eventually, Al Rogers, a bartender at the casino to whom Joan was selling the bonds. Al also happens to be Joan's secret husband, separated but never divorced. Joubert gets Chan to help him track down the killer. This is the last Chan movie starring Warner Oland, who passed away just months after its release, and it's par for the course. The business with the bonds gets convoluted but the supporting actors make it fun to stick with. Oland and Keye Luke (as Lee) are the central attraction, of course, but just as good are Harold Huber, giving a pleasantly light-toned performance as Joubert, and Sidney Blackmer as Karnoff who walks a nice line between likable and suspicious. Robert Kent is handsome but bland as Gordon; George Lynn as Al is a standout, displaying a bit more personality than Kent in a smaller but important role. Virginia Field as Evelyn and Kay Linaker as Joan are almost interchangeable but they both give adequate performances. Sometimes the reveal of the killer is disappointing if it's a minor character with little screen time but here the reveal is surprising and satisfying. Pictured are Lynn and Linaker. [DVD]

MERRILY WE GO TO HELL (1932)

At a cocktail party, Joan (Sylvia Sidney), a young heiress who escapes to the balcony to avoid a masher, meets Jerry (Fredric March), a drunk reporter who really wants to write plays and who is still not quite over his previous relationship. They hit it off and she invites him to a party at her home the next day, but he arrives so late that everyone else has left. Joan’s father isn’t impressed with Jerry, and when he proposes to Joan, Dad offers Jerry $50,000 to leave her alone. The bribe doesn’t work, and at the engagement party, Jerry shows up late and very drunk. Despite the warning signs, the wedding occurs. For a time, Jerry gives up drinking and manages to write a play. It is accepted for production, but the leading lady is Jerry’s ex, Claire. On opening night, Jerry flirts a bit with Claire, gets very drunk, and back home as he passes out, calls Joan Claire. Her father calls Joan a doormat, and indeed Jerry puts the onus on Joan for stopping him from having an affair with Claire. Joan starts doing a fair amount of drinking herself, and surprisingly, at a party, Joan announces that they should have a modern marriage: “Single lives, twin beds, and triple bromides in the morning,” and she leaves with Charlie, a friend of the couple. The rest of the film is predictably melodramatic, with separation, a pregnancy, and a rushed and ambiguous ending that can be read as either hopeful or depressing.

The "modern marriage" aspect of this film seems to have been at least partly inspired by 1930's THE DIVORCEE in which Norma Shearer suggests a similar arrangement, though she goes farther by kicking her husband out of her love life. But this pre-Code romantic melodrama adds the complication of alcoholism, and at one point, it feels like it's anticipating the 1950s DAYS OF WINE AND ROSES about a couple who both fall into drink. That plot strand is dropped when Joan discovers she's pregnant and stops drinking. If you're familiar with domestic melodramas of the 1930s, there will be few surprises in how this plot plays out, though the ending is not exactly straightforwardly "happy." [Spoiler: while separated, Joan has the baby—Jerry hears about it from a newspaper column—but there are complications that leave the baby dead and Joan very ill. Jerry shows up demanding to see her, and in her delirium she has been calling for him. They are reconciled in the hospital room, but we are not necessarily confident that enough has changed for them to work things out.] The lead actors, as directed by Dorothy Arzner, are very good. Sidney does not, in fact, act like a doormat most of the time; despite her petite frame, she is strong and solid. March is especially good at being both charming and (sometimes) repellent, and his drunk scenes are not overdone, possibly thanks to Arzner's direction. The supporting cast is adequate, though no one is given the opportunity to shine. Skeets Gallagher is fine as a peppy pal of Jerry's and Cary Grant, in a very early role, has the small part of Charlie. Given the focus on drinking and extramarital sex, this could not have been made after the Production Code went into effect in 1934. The title comes from a snarky farewell greeting of Jerry's that grows more ominous throughout the movie. Pictured are March and Sidney. [TCM]

ZOMBIES OF THE STRATOSPHERE (1952 serial)

Larry Martin is an inventor and scientist who has a jetpack that allows him to fly through the air (and therefore, according to the government, he's an expert on interplanetary affairs). G-man Steele asks him and his assistants Bob and Sue to investigate the appearance in the skies of an alien spacecraft. We see it land and Martians (with pale skin and tight sparkly jumpsuits) disembark. With help from some hired earthling thugs, they transport materials to the home of Prof. Harding who is being blackmailed to help the Martians. The population of Mars is dying off due to the thinning of the atmosphere, so the Martian plan is to set off an H-bomb explosion strong enough to send Earth spinning out of its orbit and allow Mars to take its place closer to the sun. But the Martians, led by Marex and his underling Narab, still need to get their hands on materials to finish building the bomb. In the way of Republic serials, most of the twelve chapters feature attempts at robbery (of both uranium and cash to get more uranium) and mayhem that Larry and Bob—and Sue in the unlikely event that she's around—try to thwart. Marex has a headquarters in a cave that can only be accessed by an underwater passage from another cave, so get ready for lots of scenes of Martians and humans going slowly back and forth underwater from one ladder to another, and at least one underwater fight scene. A remote control robot is used by the bad guys to pull off a bank robbery and to threaten our heroes, but nothing can keep the heroic Larry down for long.

This is the third of Republic's four Rocket Man serials. All the heroes have the same rocket suit (and the same plain office with an electronic grid along one wall so at least once in each serial someone will fall against it and get fried, or nearly so) but most have different names. The first was Jeff King (KING OF THE ROCKET MEN), and this movie came after RADAR MEN FROM THE MOON which featured George Wallace as Commando Cody; here, it's Judd Holdren as Larry Martin, but he's Cody in all but name. The generally accepted reason: ZOMBIES was planned as a Cody serial, but when Republic signed up to produce a Cody TV show, they had to change this guy's name, picking the blandest name possible. Holdren does get to be an official Commando Cody for the TV show which also became the fourth serial. Despite a great title, this is the least of the four serials in quality. Part of it might be that the shots of the Rocket Man leaping in the air, flying, and landing, which were very effective in the first movie, are used over and over again in each succeeding serial and come to feel tired. Judd Holdren is more emphatically heroic than Wallace was, but I miss Wallace's somewhat quirkier personality. The always drab and interchangeable sidekicks are particularly drab here: Aline Judge, who was Joan in RADAR, is Sue; Wilson Wood, who had a small part in RADAR, is upgraded to play Bob. Lane Bradford is oddly mild-mannered as Marex but his performance works; Leonard Nimoy, the future Mr. Spock, is in many scenes as Narab but only has a few lines of dialogue, though he gets to shine (sort of) in the final chapter. John Crawford is a standout as Roth, one of the main thugs, and he even gets a chapter heading summary card to himself (see right). One cliffhanger involves a runaway coal car which may have influenced the similar scene in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. In another cliffhanger, everyone's guns run out of bullets at the same time.  The fight scenes are, as par for the course for Republic and their stable of stunt men, pretty good. There is a lot of stock footage used from earlier serials (even from a western). Despite being watchable, this was still a disappointment for me as it just didn't live up to the cool title. The 70 minute condensed version is reviewed here. Pictured at top left are Nimoy and Bradford. [Blu-ray]

HERCULES AND THE TYRANTS OF BABYLON (1964)

3000 years ago, Babylon was ruled by a triumvirate of three siblings: Salman Osar is the bald, goateed sinister-looking brother; Azzur is the older, bearded, and slightly wiser brother; Taneal is the sexy sister who looks out only for herself. They build up their state laborers by having their army capture citizens of surrounding lands to be slaves, and among a batch of newly acquired female slaves is rumored to be Esperia, Queen of the Hellenes, though she hasn't yet been identified. The brutal Salman Osar just wants to have his way with her; Azzur wants to marry her for diplomatic reasons; Taneal wants her dead, seeing her as a threat. Then Phaleg, the king of Assyria, presents himself to the Babylonian rulers and gives them heaps of riches in exchange for all their female slaves. He claims to want them to repopulate Assyria but he really just wants Esperia. But the rulers are upset by reports that one man is acting as a protector to vulnerable folks in the region. Sure enough, legendary muscle man Hercules is doing said protecting, and we see him single-handedly stop a raiding party by tossing huge boulders at the soldiers from the hills. But Hercules is also on a personal mission: to save Esperia, who is apparently his mistress, from both slavery and forced marriage. 

Despite its lackluster title, this is one of the better sword and sandal movies of the peplum era. It has a strong and clear narrative, decent acting, a muscular lead, attractive women, and a couple of nice battle scenes. Hercules is played by Peter Lupus (pictured), a bodybuilder and actor best known for his role in the original Mission Impossible TV series (and credited here as Rock Stevens). He has a very impressive body and his acting is a notch above most other muscleman actors; he's good in most of the fight scenes as well (he kicks ass and takes names), though no one could have brought any sense of realism to the silly boulder-tossing scenes—he's better when tossing people and using weapons. Helga Liné is very good as Taneal; Anna Maria Poloni, as Esperia, is attractive but remains a flat character, and Taneal's role is stronger. Two scenes stand out. One, a riff on the famous "I am Spartacus!" scene has the female slaves tied to stakes in the boiling sun, and when asked which one is the queen, they all start yelling, "I am the queen!" The other is a battle between Hercules and three champions which is supposed to be for show until Herc discovers that one of the champion's clubs is actually a spiked mace. Finally, a point I've touched on in previous posts. It is difficult to separate the relative worth of a movie (in terms of recommending it to others) from the experience of watching it. This, like so many peplum films, was shot in widescreen but is generally only available in a pan-and-scan print (or, even worse, a squeezed distorted print), and it's usually not in very good shape. This one is good enough for me to consider watching it again if it shows up in a clean, widescreen presentation. [DVD]

CHARLIE CHAN IN HONOLULU (1938)

It looks like I have given myself two summer projects for my blog. One is to get through a backlog of serials I have been watching over the past few months, starting with the Republic Rocket Man serials. The other is rewatching some of the classic era Charlie Chan movies, occasioned by my finally catching up on the later Chan films with Roland Winters. The generally accepted Charlie Chan film canon consists of over forty films made between 1931 and 1949. Three different actors played Chan. The first and best known is Warner Oland; after his death, Sidney Toler took over, followed by Winters. Because the Oland movies are generally better known and remain fresher in my memory, I'll probably focus on the Toler films with a few Olands sprinkled in here and there. HONOLULU, the first Chan movie made after Oland died, is Sidney Toler's first. Die-hard Oland fans don’t care much for Toler, but honestly, I don't see a great deal of difference between them. Toler is a little feistier and, in his first few films, a bit lighter on his feet than Oland, and of course, both are portly non-Asian actors done up in varying degrees in yellowface elements. I give a slight nod to Oland just because his films at Fox are generally of a higher budget—many of the later Toler films, done for B-movie studio Monogram, suffer from a lower budget. 

Chan is a globe-trotting detective throughout the film series, but his home base was Hawaii and, appropriately for a new beginning, this is set in Honolulu, with the opening scene showing Chan eating dinner with his large family. His oldest son Lee is away at art school but his #2 son Jimmy is adamant about following in his pop's footsteps as a detective. Son-in-law Wing arrives with news of the imminent birth of Charlie's first grandchild, so most of the clan heads to the hospital, but Jimmy takes a phone call meant for his father to investigate a murder on a freighter. Claiming to be Charlie, Jimmy, accompanied by his younger brother Tommy, heads to the docks. Among the passengers who are being detained on the ship: a bank secretary who was supposed to deliver $300,000 in cash to the murdered man, a psychiatrist who pretends to be hard of hearing and who claims to have a live brain in his luggage (and because he's played by George Zucco in mad doctor mode, we believe he might), a rich widow, an animal keeper who is guarding a large shipment of zoo animals in the hold, and a San Francisco cop who is transporting a handcuffed criminal. Eventually, Tommy is exposed just as the group is about to dump him in the drink, but his dad arrives in time to save his son and take over the case. Chan soon discovers that few of the people on the ship, perhaps even the crew members, are what they claim to be, but Chan eventually gathers all the suspects in a room and reveals the killer and the motive. This one is enjoyable, with Victor Sen Yung (pictured with Toler) making his first appearance as Jimmy Chan; he went on to do eighteen Chan movies, though in the later entries with Roland Winters, his name was Tommy. George Zucco is always a welcome face and he keeps us on our toes here—is he an insane bad guy or a goofy good guy? John King is the possible love interest for the secretary (Phyllis Brooks), assuming that she is cleared of suspicion. The entire supporting cast is solid, including Richard Lane, Marc Lawrence, Robert Barratt, and Philip Ahn. At times, the film threatens to approach the pace of a screwball comedy, and it generally works. [DVD]

RADAR MEN FROM THE MOON (1952 serial)

There has been a series of explosions of unknown origin, generated with atomic power, destroying military and industrial properties. Government agent Henderson seeks help from Commando Cody, a civilian research scientist whose main claim to fame is the jetpack outfit that allows him to fly in the air. Atomic activity has been observed on the moon, so Cody, with his associates Ted and Joan (and a pilot named Hank whom we don't see much of) head up there in his experimental rocket, wearing their street clothes, to see what's what. They find Retik, ruler of a small populace living in a city (with architecture out of ancient Rome), making plans for a full-scale invasion of Earth due to the thinning out of the moon’s atmosphere (with the moon landscape, complete with clouds, looking like that of California). Retik has been using a powerful atomic ray gun to cause the destruction on Earth and Cody pumps nitrous oxide into Retik's lair to knock everyone out so he can steal the ray gun, which is powered by the moon element lunarium. They don't get it and head back to Earth where they are set upon by Krog, Retik's chief underling, his henchman Graber, and a handful of thugs. What follows is a series of chapters involving Krog using robbery to get funds, Cody going back to the moon to get some lunarium, and Retik eventually coming to Earth himself to ensure his plans are fulfilled. Of course, they're not, and despite atomic ray guns and earth-melting weapons, it's old-fashioned guns and fistfights (and the jetpacks) that help Cody beat the moon men.

This is a quasi-sequel to KING OF THE ROCKET MEN, using the same jetpack and some of the same sets and effects (like the flying scenes and the melting earth), but with a different lead character, as Commando Cody (George D. Wallace, pictured) replaces Jeff King. ROCKET MEN is probably the better movie with a more diverse repertory of characters and cliffhangers, though this one has space travel and a more interesting lead actor. Wallace is a bit doughy looking and sometimes overarticulates his lines, but both his looks and his delivery grew on me. He has an air of confidence that inspires his cohorts. The rest of the actors are nothing special. William Bakewell makes little impression as Ted; Aline Judge is a little better as Joan, but she has to remain subservient. When Cody questions why she should join them on the trip to the moon, she replies that someone has to make their meals, right? Later, as they leave the moon, the first thing she does in the ship is to get coffee for everyone. Both main villains (dumpy men in long robes) inspire little fear, though Clayton Moore (later TV's Lone Ranger) is effective as Graber, the only henchman to survive to the end. Roy Barcroft as Retik is incredibly bland. The best fisticuffs scene isn't on the moon, but in Al's Cafe back on Earth. Like ROCKET MEN, this has an ill-fitting title; men from the moon (who look every bit like slow, stocky earthlings) are present, but I don't remember anything about radar coming up. A 100-minute condensed version put together for TV in the 1960s, RETIK THE MOON MENACE, crams in a surprisingly good amount of the plot—one entire chapter of RADAR is a recap episode—though I must admit that the constant action with little downtime wears one down. Still, watching RETIK might be the way to go if you have a low tolerance for serials. Also known as Rocket Man 2. [Blu-ray]

KING OF THE JUNGLE (1933)

The Knolls family gets a permit to go into lion country in Kenya on a photographic safari. When lions attack their camp, the parents are killed but their 5-year-old son survives and is raised by a lion family as if he were a cub. Years later, he's all grown-up, wearing a loincloth and living with the lions (whom he communicates with by roaring) and sometimes protecting them. We pick the story up again as a rancher (Douglas Dumbrille) is trying to ward off attacks by lions on his cattle—the lions are starving due to drought and desperate for food. Crabbe sneaks onto his property and lets the cattle loose for the lions to feast on. Hunter Robert Barrat, who is looking to trap some lions to sell to circus manager Sidney Toler, tells Dumbrille that it was probably the work of the rumored Lion Man. They set up their own trap for the lions and manage to bag a handful, and the Lion Man as well. Sent to the States, Crabbe jumps off the ship as it comes into the harbor, gets to land, jumps through the first suburban dining room window he sees, and starts eating off the freshly set plates. He is discovered by Frances Dee who wants to help him, but her friend calls the police and Crabbe is taken back to Toler. Dee winds up accompanying him and becomes a friend, teacher, and confidante (and perhaps a romantic interest, though that is mostly downplayed). At the circus, Toler ends up putting Crabbe on salary and featuring him in a lion taming act and he's a hit—as he also is with some of the female members of the circus troupe. He tells Dee that his plan is to make enough money to buy the lions and take them back to Kenya. Things go sideways when a hired hand (Warner Richmond) taunts one of the lions and gets his hand bitten off; for revenge, he tries to poison the lion. Toler catches him, but not before he has set a fire that rages through the circus, setting off lions, a tiger, and some elephants. Can Crabbe save the day?

Clearly, this was a mid-budget attempt by Paramount to steal some of MGM's A-budget Tarzan thunder a year after the first Ape Man movie was released. Supposedly Crabbe, a swimming champ, tried out the role of Tarzan but lost it to Johnny Weissmuller, also a swimming champ. But though there are similarities in the backstory, this quickly sets itself up in a different direction, with the bulk of the movie set in the States as Crabbe becomes civilized and educated. Whereas Tarzan (in the first couple of movies at least) remains in a relatively uncivilized state of nature, Crabbe can pass for fully socialized in manner and dress—though he continues to wear that abbreviated loincloth in his circus act, which not only shows off Crabbe's nice physique, but also his comely ass (it's basically a thong). His somewhat light vocal delivery lacks danger, making him a less threatening figure than Tarzan. Frances Dee is nicely befuddled at first but grows to truly care for Crabbe (his character is given the name Kaspa by Toler, which has no significance). I like there are few real villains here: Toler, who is in fact engaging in human trafficking, treats Crabbe well; Barrat is just doing his job (frowned upon nowadays though it may be), and Dumbrille is justified in trying to save his cattle—once we leave Africa, we hear no more about those two. Only Richmond is a hissable bad guy, and he's not around long enough to think about much. The fiery climax is well done. This was a pleasant surprise, and if there had been a sequel, I'd watch it with pleasure. Crabbe (best known as Flash Gordon and Buck Rogers in the 30s serials) would eventually play Tarzan later that year in the serial TARZAN THE FEARLESS, which is now considered lost but can be seen in an 85-minute feature film version. Pictured are Toler, Crabbe and Dee. [YouTube]

NIGHT SLAVES (1970)

Clay Howard is dropping out of the rat race, selling his half of his business to his partner, Matt Russell, while his wife Marjorie, who happens to be having an affair with Matt, is planning on leaving Clay. But when Clay gets in a serious car accident which kills two other people, a metal plate is put in his head, and weeks later, for rest and recreation, he and his wife stop at a boarding house in a small town on a short, impromptu vacation. That night, Clay wakes up to see hordes of townspeople sleepwalking their way onto trucks that are driven out of town. He's even more shocked when he sees his wife among them. Clay tries to stop her but she, like the others, is unresponsive. The only person who seems conscious is a silent giggling girl who takes him back to his room. The next morning, everything seems back to normal. Marjorie, the sheriff and the townspeople seem not to know what happened and tell Clay he must have dreamed it. But that night, it happens again. [Spoiler!] It turns out that the giggling girl is possessed by an alien force named Naillil who, along with another alien (Noel) in the person of the town simpleton, is forcing the townsfolk to devote their nights to helping to rebuild their spaceship which crashed just outside of town. Clay is immune to their mental commands because of the plate in his head. Naillil says her people are basically energy beings who are forbidden from falling in love, but of course, that's what she's doing with Clay. It seems improbable, but could a happy ending be in store for these two? The climax involves a lynch mob (the townsfolk think Clay might be a murderer), the arrival of Matt Russell, and a somewhat ambiguous ending.

This TV movie, which resembles a relatively benign Invasion of the Body Snatchers, tries for a while to keep up the possibility that all the small town nighttime weirdness is in Clay's head, but the sci-fi explanation kicks in about halfway through, which causes the well-wrought tension of the first half to collapse, and the ending, though unexpected, is a bit disappointing. Its short run time doesn't allow any real character development, and poor Matt (Scott Marlowe), with little to do, seems to have been thrown into the mix at the last minute. James Franciscus, handsome and hunky as usual (pictured), is pretty good as the confused Clay, though his need to escape the rat race is never examined and is unimportant to the plot until the last few minutes. He has some chemistry with Lee Grant, as Marjorie but none with Tisha Sterling who is dull as dishwater as Naillil. Andrew Prine is a bit better as Noel; he gets to play two different personalities as the slow-witted Fess and the smart alien, whereas Stirling mostly just plays one persona. Leslie Neilsen is adequate as the sheriff. By the 45 minute mark, the film has run out of steam and the last half hour feels padded out, especially with no believable attraction between Franciscus and Stirling. At one point, it's pointed out that Noel and Naillil are the names of Clay's accident victims, Leon and Lillian, backwards, a gimmick thrown in to make us briefly think this all might just be a hallucination. It ends up being an unconventional romance between two people with no chemistry—a fairly meh experience. [YouTube]

TEENAGE MONSTER (1957)

In June, 1880, on the outskirts of an Old West town, Ruth, her husband Jim and their 10-year-old son Charlie are hunting for gold in a cave when a meteor falls from the sky, killing Jim and scarring Charlie's face. Seven years later, Charlie has become a large, hairy, deformed man, still with the mind of a child, barely able to communicate. He and his mother have been living in an isolated cave while Ruth still looks for gold. Occasionally the restless Charlie escapes, killing cattle and sheep, scaring children, and sometimes killing a person who stumbles into his path. Ruth finally discovers a vein of gold, buys a small house, and keeps Charlie isolated in an upstairs bedroom. She also begins a mild flirtation with Bob, the local sheriff. Jealous of the attention his mom is giving to someone else, Charlie eventually attacks Kathy, a young waitress. Ruth pays Kathy not to tell anyone, and to live with them as a companion. When Kathy's boyfriend Marv finds out she has money, he takes the money from her, and she gets Charlie to kill Marv for her. Eventually, Kathy starts blackmailing Ruth, then decides to get Charlie to kill both Ruth and Bob. There are unhappy endings all around.

The thing anyone who has seen this movie will tell you first is that there isn't really a teenage monster—the actor playing the "teenaged" Charlie, Gil Perkins, is fifty and looks it, and the hairy monster makeup ages him even more. The second thing they'll tell you is that the movie isn't very good. It isn't, not even as a campy good-bad movie. It was made because the producer needed a second feature to run with his slightly better B-horror film THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS. At least two of the cast members are legitimate actors with careers: Anne Gwynne (Ruth) who appeared in over fifty B-films and TV shows from 1939 to the 1950s, and Gloria Castillo (Kathy), known to sci-fi fans for INVASION OF THE SAUCER MEN. They both overact, as does Gil Perkins (the monster), who had a long career in TV and in stunt work. Perkins growls his dialogue in a way that makes it understandable only half the time. The slightly manic edge brought to the performances encourages kinky psychological readings of the plot that were almost certainly not intended by the filmmakers. Stuart Wade, as Bob, gives the only low-key performance, but it doesn't help. The repetition of the monster constantly escaping and his mother constantly telling him not to gets wearying. The director, Jacques R. Marquette, was mostly a producer and cinematographer and never directed another film. Not recommended. Pictured are Perkins and Castillo. [YouTube]